Bitchy Friend

I have been accused as being a bitch. Including in friendships. I have a long dramatic history with girl friends...so I guess more likely than not I have my guard up.

One of the things that I have been accused of is if a friend makes a mistake I'm out. Some of that is completely true. If a "friend" gossips about me, tells people I'm horrible, argues with me for the sake of arguing...I'm out.

My idea is that if you're not bringing something meaningful to my life...then why do I need you?

Some people I can see coming from a mile away, and I can be a friendly acquaintance, but I'll probably never be a friend.

Some people slip under my radar. And what is the saying? Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice Shame on me! I don't necessarily live by that saying, but it's a good saying. They invented it for a reason. I don't see any reason as an almost 35 year old mother, wife and woman to keep people close and in my life for dramatic reasons.

Now, if I've known you forever? I'll probably always know you forever. We may not be bff, but we'll always keep in touch some how.

However, if I am just getting to know you and you start the absolute bull shit? WHY would I invite it into my life? Why would I waste the energy of my friendship? Cause I think that friendships DO take energy. I'm not always great at it to the people who I love why would I waste it on someone who is constantly needing sympathy, money, drama and more?

So if you need to think of me as a bitchy friend, by all means do it. But, on my list of "good points" I have to say that I'm pretty fierce about the people I let into my life (which is one of the reasons I'll cut people off too - I'm the type of person who will take a bullet verbal or real for a true friend...if you're going to cause me nothing but bullets and not bring anything to my life...uhh duh).

My current problem is this. I see a person who I would say is more than an acquaintance, but less than a bff being taken advantage of. AUGH. Honestly if it was someone I truly spent time with (either via phone, skype, or real life) I would probably say something. I could get it into real conversation. But this person and I don't really "talk".

The friend in question is being used (in my humble opinion) and she's such a sweet person that she is blind to it. She is always willing to see the best in people (which I think is wonderful but yet leaves her incredibly vulnerable). And me being the bitchy person that I am, can see through the user a mile away.

Said user has used people in the past. She is a person who never takes responsibility for herself and her actions. Whether she is using people for sympathy (don't get me wrong - everyone needs sympathy SOME days...but I have limits when you refuse to change your life) or whether she is using them for money - I have issues with her. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who does...but AUGH.

So I can't just email or text or call and say said person is using you stop letting her. It would be weird and awkward and since I have a high standard for my friends, the blame of bitchiness would get thrown at me and the person would continue to get used.

I don't know what to do to stop it. I don't even know if it's my place to stop it. I just know that I feel like somethings wrong and I can't control it (something I hate).

Any suggestions?